How to Help a Socially Awkward Child
It hurts when you see your child struggling to make friends, feeling self-conscious or left out. You may be wondering what is the best way to help your child in these situations. Social awkwardness is a common growing pain for children and teens. It's important to remember that social skills can be learned and improved with patience, understanding, and the right strategies.
What Does Socially Awkward Mean?
Socially Awkward Is:
Feeling nervous or uncomfortable in social situations, especially with new people or large groups.
Having difficulty understanding social cues or knowing the appropriate way to respond in conversations.
Experiencing frequent misunderstandings or miscommunications with others.
Feeling out of place or different from others.
Making unintentional social mistakes, such as interrupting others or not maintaining eye contact.
Socially Awkward Is Not:
A permanent condition; with practice and support, social skills can improve over time.
A sign of lack of intelligence.
The same as social anxiety; they can overlap but social anxiety involves intense fear of social situations and social awkwardness is more about mistakes.
Limited to any specific personality type; both introverts and extroverts can experience social awkwardness.
Effective Strategies for Helping Your Socially Awkward Child:
Role Playing at Home
Role-playing at home can be a powerful tool to help children develop social skills and build confidence in interacting with others. You can set up common social situations for your child to practice, such as starting a conversation, joining in with a new group of kids, or handling conflict. You can write down specific situations on notecards and draw them out of a bowl to make it more of a game. Make sure you also take your turn responding to situations so it’s not one-sided. Your child will learn from how you handle a social situation. You can even incorporate costumes or props to make it fun.
Stay Supportive - 4 positives for every 1 negative
Feeling socially awkward and having your parent step in to help you can be embarrassing and challenging for your child. Try not to make them self-conscious and remind them that it’s common for kids to struggle socially. For every one negative interaction or input you have about your child’s behavior, make sure you are countering it with four positive comments. This may sound like a lot, but negative interactions stick in our brain stronger than positive interactions, making it important to balance them out with more positives.
Growing Social Skills in a Low-Pressure Environment
Finding group activities for your child to participate in such as sports, art, building with Legos, or playing games can help them develop social skills in a low-pressure environment. These activities allow children to interact with peers while focusing on a shared interest, which can make social interactions feel less intimidating. These positive experiences can boost their confidence and help them feel more comfortable in social situations.
Practice Interacting in an Attentive Way With All Those You Encounter
Modeling social skills with all of those whom you encounter in your daily activities and errands is important, as children often learn by observing their parents. Strike up a conversation with your waitress, gas station attendant, and cashier at the grocery store. Giving these people your undivided attention while you are interacting with them and acting in a kind, positive way is important for your child to see. If your child also wants to interact with them, that’s great too. These brief, low-stakes interactions provide opportunities to practice the most basic of social skills, such as making eye contact, saying please and thank you, and engaging in small talk.
Social Skill Groups for Kids
Social skill groups provide a supportive environment where children can learn and practice social skills with peers under the guidance of a trained therapist or facilitator. These groups often use structured activities, games, and role-playing exercises to teach skills such as making friends, handling conflicts, and understanding social cues. Participating in a social skills group can help your child feel less isolated and more confident in their ability to interact with others. Not only that, but it takes some of the pressure off of you as a parent to be the one responsible for teaching your child all of these skills. These groups are often held at therapy practices, community centers or even offered after-school.
In Conclusion
Nobody likes feeling socially awkward or like the odd one out. While feeling socially awkward as a child is challenging, it is a common issue that can be effectively addressed. By focusing on honing your child's social skills, you not only help them navigate their friend circles more easily but also prepare them for better career opportunities and more comfortable interactions throughout their life. Although addressing social awkwardness may be uncomfortable for both you and your child, the long-term benefits will be well worth the effort. With patience, understanding, and the right strategies, your child can develop the social confidence they need to thrive.
